It’s been quite some time since I’ve connected with most of you, and I thought I’d fill you in on what God is doing with my family and me. Over the last six months I’ve been on a much needed sabbatical after being the Worship Pastor going on 11 years at City Church (formally CrossRoads Community Church.) We’ve just come off our sabbatical and are slowly stepping back into some rhythms of work. While the nature of most sabbaticals are to look ahead to see what’s next in ministry/career, this has not been the case for us. It is clear that God has revealed some deep places in my heart that needed to be healed and put back together. My anger, anxiety and depression affected my family and my own heart. I realized the reason I spoke and taught so much about the “Father’s Heart” was actually because it was a huge deficit in my own identity. Ministry had replaced truly knowing Jesus. About 2 months into the sabbatical, I hit a wall and realized I couldn’t run away from myself or my heart. I quickly learned that I was addicted to my own performance and the need for approval. Two key questions were asked of me during this time.
1) Do you feel like you’re kind to yourself?
2) Do you feel like God enjoys you?
My answer to the first question was NO. My answer to the second question was YES with this disclaimer :: Only when I’m contributing or doing something for His Kingdom. A few months later, my wife and I flew to Colorado and immersed ourselves in a deep amount of therapy and counseling. It was intense, and a lot was revealed. You realize during these moments that “heart healing” is a process, and being vulnerable is not a weakness but a huge demonstration of courage. I can honestly say that we’re rested, encouraged and have an incredible community loving us well as we’re entering back into ministry. Jesus is a real person with a real heart, He is understanding and acquainted with grief in every hard situation we walk through.
Through the course of the sabbatical we were intentional about not seeking direction for next steps in ministry or career. The goal was to focus on wholeness, rest, and be present with our family. The sabbatical wasn’t given because I was in any immoral sin or situation, but simply because I needed rest and a pause in the pace going on around me. We were also intentional about being open handed with the people God wanted to put in our lives during our time away from the church. God established some clear relationships that led to Him speaking prophetically over our lives and handing us back some pieces of our hearts that had been put on the shelf for a season.
After looking back through this sabbatical and hearing from the Lord, Lauren and I have felt the call to step away from the Worship Pastor position at City Church. I will continue to be a part of the staff at City Church as the Worship Artist in Residence. We will be involved in the City Church Community and involved in the worship ministry. In a community that loves and believes in us, we have been given a new opportunity to focus on huge pieces of our hearts that haven’t been given the attention they deserve.
-We will continue to develop, disciple and build out worship (school) intensives for worship leaders and creatives.
-We will be travelling more with a focus on itinerant ministry opportunities including leading worship, speaking, teaching and potentially mobilizing worship schools and workshops for other worship teams.
-We will be focusing on songwriting for City Church and the larger Church community.
-We will be producing songs and albums for other worship artists and leaders.
We are truly thankful and excited to say that all of these endeavors will be underneath the covering of the City Church leadership. We will work alongside a team to help us schedule, build, and dream this vision that has been in our hearts for quite some time.
Lastly, we would love to ask for your prayers and encouragement as we immerse ourselves in this adventure. We aren’t sure what this season will look like, but we fully believe that more clarity will come as we walk this out in humility and faith. You are so incredibly special to our hearts, and if any opportunity to serve alongside you comes available, we would be honored if you would consider us. We’re excited, hopeful and grateful for what is to come. Thanks for being our friends.
David & Lauren Walker